Category Archives: Perseverance

What it takes to prevail

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Do you know what it takes to achieve what you want and succeed in life?

No one else determines your rise in the world but you. Your expectant attitude, your driven actions, your bold determination, your loyal beliefs in your abilities—these are powerful allies in the pursuit of the good life.

IMG_2171Author Ralph Marston wrote: The biggest factor in your success is you. Knowledge, information, skills and resources all play a part, to be sure. Yet success hinges mostly on your will to make it happen.

Gripping the belief that you deserve success is necessary gear to get ahead. Self-doubt, blame, anger, and negativity are enemies that will render you ineffective and keep you stuck in mediocrity.

Are you conscious of the beliefs you hold about yourself? These beliefs are the most significant opinions you will ever outline. What you believe you can do, or can not do, how worthy you are of happiness and success are all determined by your beliefs in who you are.

If you believe that you are unique, deserving, and skilled, then you will IMG_2342
experience a life defined by those beliefs. If you have the opinion that you are flawed, inadequate, and undeserving, then what you experience in your life will support that belief.

This is why the opinion you hold of yourself and the one you embrace is the most determining clue of your future.

Based on what you are experiencing in life, what is your opinion of yourself?

The world will not believe in you if you don’t believe in yourself. Examine your thoughts today and determine if they are powerful allies or sabotaging foes.

Think about it.

 

©All rights reserved, 2014, Dr. Sandy Nelson, E-Couch.net
Photos courtesy of Pixabay.com

Dealing With Disappointment

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There’s no doubt that today we live in a spoiled society. There’s little delayed gratification and a lot of stuff we feel entitled to have, or to experience—now. The more things we think are deserved or that we should possess, the more disappointed we are when it doesn’t occur.

IMG_0866 - CopyDr. David Brandt, author of Is That All There Is? wrote: Not all disappointments are equal. Some are devastating. Others scarcely seem to matter. It all depends upon the degree of emotional involvement in the expectation. The greater the investment, the more severe the disappointment. The greater the underlying wish for an event to occur, the stronger the pain when it doesn’t. 

French author and Nobel Prize winner, Andre Gide, was right when he said: Long only for what you have. However, no one really wants to hear that. Instead of recognizing on a daily basis what we already possess and then work towards what we want, we may recognize on a daily basis what we don’t have and ignore what we do. We may dwell on what’s lacking in our life, and harp on all the instances we failed to acquire what we wanted. This type of attitude towards disappointment can destroy self-esteem, gratitude, and motivation.

Individuals who often experience disappointments may not be able to identifyfailure1 what disappointments are intended to teach. There could be a pattern of expectations that are not rooted in reality. Dr. David Brandt puts it this way: Whether out of fear, disapproval, or anxiety, those who repeatedly experience disappointment have a psychological history that has produced expectations that are unrealistic, too absolute, too high or low. They need to readjust those expectations, but forces in their personality prevent them from doing so. 

If we don’t process disappointment, accept the outcome and adjust to the reality that is presented, we’ll continue to want what we can’t have while taking for granted the many blessings inside our front door. We may think that having something or someone is necessary in order to feel happy and okay. Thinking that we “have to have” anything places the source of our well being and happiness dependent on something outside ourselves.

Acceptance of “what is,” is a struggle only when we can’t let go of the attachment to what we wanted. This doesn’t mean that we don’t try again or plan something different in order to get what we want, it means that we accept that it wasn’t acquired this time. It’s important to accept and appreciate what we have, and to keep thinking of what we want and plan the next effort to get it.

Think about it.

 

©All rights reserved, 2014, Dr. Sandy Nelson, E-Couch.net
Photos courtesy of Pixabay.com

What do you need so happiness and success can arrive?

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“Be more concerned with your character than with your reputation. Your character is what you really are while your reputation is merely what others think you are.” These words written by the extraordinary Dale Carnegie gives us all a reminder about the significance of our own inner character versus the opinions of us that others may hold.

Would it make our lives easier if we could control how other people think of us? If we could have the favorable opinion of everyone in our lives we would be IMG_0275rid of conflicts, disapproval, and rejection. But we don’t hold a remote control to change the channeled thoughts and feelings of other people to ones of our liking. People are going to think what they themselves decide to believe. This fact is precisely why having your own approval on your life is so crucial to well-being. Staying true to your own character and liking yourself will enable you to remain unruffled by the gossip of others. To realize the importance of knowing yourself and liking what you know, is a necessary step for self-respect.

I don’t know any happy and successful people with a self-contempt attitude toward themselves. I don’t know any happy and successful people with bruisesIMG_0843 - Copy from beating themselves up over mistakes and unwanted outcomes. The happy and successful people I know hold a humble confidence in themselves. They’ve spent time dealing with past issues that would block their goals. They’ve corrected the lies they have believed about their inadequacy and shortcomings that would prevent their confidence. They know their weaknesses and manage them rather than excuse them or blame someone else for their existence.

Motivational speaker and self-development guru, Brian Tracy, states “If you wish to achieve worthwhile things in your personal and career life, you must become a worthwhile person in your own self-development.” Where are you today in your self-development? What do you need to correct so happiness and success can arrive?

Think about it. In caring, Sandy

If you lack respect and esteem for yourself, how can you accept the regard someone else has for you?

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“Quiet on the set! Ready… Action!”
belief9 - CopyLet’s say your life story is being filmed as a movie, how is your role conveyed? What would the audience see? Are you a victim who feels powerless to alter the direction of your life? Or, do you outlast obstacles and rescue yourself from toxic situations?                                                                                                           Sometimes, it seems like a battle just to get out of bed in the morning. But, you do. Sometimes, showing up for the day is overwhelming. But, you do. A valiant champion is not the person who succeeds at one task on just one day. No, it’s the courageous figure who’s resolute in every day difficulties and challenges. It takes fortitude to own your life, to own your story, to change the script, and that makes you a shining star!
Create the highest grandest vision possible for your life because you become sun10what you believe. Never act against yourself—never betray your true self unless the goal in life is your misery. Your true self—your personality, your preferences, your needs, your opinions—were formed to make you happy and bring about a sense of purpose. When you act in contrary to whom you are then your enthusiasm, and your guiding principle will be absent.
Some people fear being themselves. They think that they won’t be liked or accepted. But you see, if you reject and dislike yourself so much that you need to pretend to be someone else, then no amount of acceptance from other people will be enough. You can’t accept an emotion from other people that you forbid to give to yourself. If you lack respect and esteem for yourself, how can you accept the regard someone else has for you?
Thanks for your time and comments! -Dr. Sandy

©All rights reserved, 2014, Dr. Sandy Nelson, E-Couch.net

Are you and perseverance in the game?

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Perseverance, faith and commitment produces some remarkable successes. But, many of us are stifled by past failures and inadequacies. We’re afraid to try. But the errors of the past are not the forecast for tomorrow. We can’t allow ourselves to live in a world of prior mistakes. Because our hard work and efforts come from the heart, mistakes or failures hurt us deeply. Yet we need not be obsessed with the pain of disappointment and inadequacy. We need to start thinking of what’s next. What do we need to do now.

With ordinary talent and extraordinary perseverance, all things are attainable.¹ Did you catch that word: ordinary. Ordinary talent – not rocket science talent – ordinary. Never giving up is not only a test of the belief in ourselves, it’s shows our life character. Look at past mistakes and failures as valuable information of what didn’t work and what to do differently.

Thomas Edison is as famous for his example of tenacity as he is for giving the world the light bulb. He didn’t give up when his first efforts to find an effective filament for the carbon incandescent lamp failed. He did countless experiments with countless kinds materials. As each failed, he would toss it out the window. The pile reached to the second story of his house. He didn’t quit. Instead, he sent men to China, Japan, South America, Asia, and Jamaica in search of fibers and grasses to test in his lab.

IMG_0877One weary day on October 21, 1879 – after 13 months of repeated failures – he succeeded in his search for a filament that would stand the stress of electric current. This is how it happened:                                                                                                                                     Casually picking up a bit of lampblack, he mixed it with tar and rolled it into a thin thread. Then the thought occurred: Why not try a carbonized cotton fiber? For five hours he worked, but it broke before he could remove the mold. Two spools of thread were used up. At last a perfect strand emerged – only to be ruined when trying to place it in a glass tube. Edison refused to admit defeat. He continued without sleep for two days and two nights. Finally, he managed to slip one of the carbonized threads into a vacuum-sealed bulb. And he turned on the current. The sight he had long desired to see finally met his eyes. His persistence amid such discouraging odds has given the world the wonderful electric light!

To be successful you need to keep thinking – to keep trying – to keep learning. Stay in the game. -Dr. Sandy

¹Sir Thomas Foxwell Buxton

©All rights reserved, 2014, Dr. Sandy Nelson, E-Couch.net

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